As the sands of time slip through an hour glass, so too do the days of chemo.
This last round was vomit absent but nausea plentiful. If anything, it really knocked me around a bit more that some previous rounds. I’m usually starting to feel a bit more normal by Monday, but this time around, Monday felt more like a Sunday, with sleeping the best way to pass the time.
People often ask me if each round gets worse. The short answer is yes, but I think the rounds on the whole have plateaued long ago and it is only a slow descent into misery now. Each round really mimics the previous, with differences mostly centering around it’s own quirks and irrational symptomatology. On the whole, whilst there is a slow decline with each round, I have very much settled into the routine of chemo once every 2 weeks. The routine helps to make it predictable, and also helps to make it a scheduled part of life, rather than the uninvited monster that it is. I guess routine becomes it’s own coping mechanism.
Until next time…
A friend of mine who teaches year 10 in Christchurch did a lesson on resilience, as a part of their study on change, loss and grief. As it turns out, they used me as a case study, and watched my interview on Good Morning last year. The kids then wrote letters of feed back to me after the study, which I have their permission to place here for your reading.
Its always encouraging to hear things like this in the midst of tough times.
This is a photograph of a cameraman filming me taking a photograph of him filming me.
Apparently it will air in the second week of June. More details to follow.
Well, Round 30 finally happened, after being delayed by man-flu two weeks back. The round itself was someone routine, nothing particularly new except for the fact that I have finally crossed the vomit threshold. After holding out for 29 rounds of chemo and no vomiting, the chucking began. This was a fairly benign episode of vomiting though, so at the end of the day, nothing to really write about… that being said, I just did.
Perhaps the biggest difference of this round of chemotherapy over previous rounds was that it was caught on film. I’m being filmed at the moment for an article that will hopefully run on bowel cancer awareness week on 20/20. They started filming last Friday, the day of my chemo, and are following me off and on for bits over the next week or so. I shall keep you all posted as to when that will air exactly. Its quite an interesting insight into a whole different industry and how it works!
In slightly different news, my blogging has been pretty weak of late, largely due to the huge hours I’m working on the Acute Surgical Unit at Auckland Hospital, between that and chemo, I’ve had little time to write much. In 2 weeks time, I’m changing over the the Cardiothoracic Surgical Unit, which I’m informed is quite a different pace of work, so I will hopefully be able to engage in a bit more reflection and writing over that time.
Till next time…
At easter camp recently. A happy baby.
Shutter 1/500, f/4, ISO 200, 45mm.
Someone from Easter camp has managed to get hold of my talk and put it up on Youtube before I even got hold of it! So if you are interested, here it is in all 4 parts, about 35 minutes all up. The quality here isn’t great, but hopefully I will be able to upload a version once I get my hands on it.
Also, this is a very heavily faith based talk to a faith based audience, and important thing to keep in mind when watching it.
The other night I decided to try and capture Auckland from Bayswater Marina. The evening was cloudy, but it was warm, and the air was clear. I find these kind of shots are challenging to find the exposure that is just right. Even then, i’m not convinced I actually got it right in this shot. It is hard to find the balance between over-exposing the brighter areas of the photo versus under exposing the darker areas. In this photo I leaned more towards a higher exposure, clipping some of the highlights, but retaining the detail in the darker ares such as building outlines.
I also discovered that I have way too many pixels that run hot on long exposures for my liking.
Shutter 8.0s; f/9, ISO 200, 28mm.